Here is what we will tell you about today. Words. Humans have good words and bad words. We, Stella and Lena, have decided that it is time to bury all bad human words. I Stella will start to dig the hole right now. Here is what will go deep into the hole.
First, the words "BAD DOG". These are the very, very worst of all human words. We do not want to hear them ever again. Ha! Into the very bottom of the hole.
Next in is the word "NO." We dogs hates this word. "No" goes in right on top of "bad dog."
Okay, get ready now for these next words, "Back", "Inside", and "Down". These are not as bad as the first two but still, who needs them? Not us.
Oh noes, we almost forgot. The third baddest of human words - "time for a bath." Mom said this to both of us last week. It was really awful what happened next. Why does she do these kind of bad things to us? She says she loves us but she makes cold water squirt all over us. Bad mom! There. See how it feels!
Now for the good words. We plan to train mom to say these lots and lots of times. I Lena will tell you about some of my bestest human words.
Good Dog. This is what mom says when she is happy with us and gives us smiles and hugs and yummsy things to eat. We have to do what her words tell us to get her to say this "good dog" to us.
Cookies - Almost the best. Sometimes mom just yells "Cookies" because she loves us and we run and wriggle and she gives us cookies. Sometimes we have to show her all of our special tricks before she will gives them to us.
Bonesos - Not sure which is better actually, bonesos or cookies.
More words we like and want to hear more of. Lots more of. Here they are . . . Walk. Go. Get in the truck. Up. Lets Go. Hugs. Squeekie. Zoomies .
There, you see there are many human words that are the best and can be said just as easy as the words that we have decided must go and are now going to be buried once and for all.
We have to speak, we do. If we wait for mom to write the words for our blog, we will be putting on ice skates in that hot place down there, far under the ground.
Today is a very, very sad day. Tomorrow we start the time when mom gets up early and kicks us out of our softies on the bed. She will make us go outside in the cold and damp grass while she showers and dresses in fancy clothes that she says we can't shed on. Then she leaves us. Everyday. For a long time.
Mom is not happy either. She says that summer vacation is over. We don't know what a vacation is but when mom is with us all day, we sure have fun. Here are lots of pictures of us, having fun for weeks and weeks and weeks. Mom says this is what summer vacations are for. Fun. We say they are for the dogs. We likes them the best.
Here I, Stella, am doing walkies in my easy leader. See how it matches my special colors.
Sometimes mom hitches us together and we go for walkies.
Ha ha, here I Lena gots to go camping with mom without Stella. It would have been perfect but somehow that stupid Red Horse got to come along and I had to stay at the tent when mom and Red Horse got to ride on lots and lots of trails.
Oh ha ha ha. And here's I Stella playing the game called "pay backs" on Lena.
We like to steal the horses' water cuz they always steals mom's attention from us.
But horses do one good thing - they make the very best stinkies to roll in, lots and lots of stinkies.
We love to run chases.
Really loves it.
Zoomies are even better than walkies.
I Lena am a versatile dog and do many jobs. Here I am watching the ocean.
Here is the water trying to trick me by tasting of too much salt.
I didn't like that so I am pawing the tricksy water.
Heh, heh, and here I am again teaching Stella the not-so-scary pit bull who is the alpha dog . . . er, hope mom isn't watching cuz she will say SHE is the alpha dog.
This is my "aren't I a good, cute dog" face I saves just for mom. I am waiting for her to say "OK" so I can runs across the street into the place where Red Horse lives. I am happy becuz I am going to get to roll in my bestest most favorite smells, horse stinkies. Did I tell you I don't just roll in them? Horse stinkies are yummy to crunch on.
We know there haven't been too many blog stories about us lately, but we want everyone to know it is cuz of all our fun. At least we have lots of fun times to dream about while we wait for mom to come home from work. We have to go through the wet times and the cold times and the windy times before next summer fun times returns for us.
Enough is enough! Look around, this is a perfectly good blog, right? And when was the last post? June. JUNE! We have to take the problem in paw and save our blog. Forget the mother who neglects our special site. Going to the Dogs is being taken over by the dogs - us, Lena and Stella.
So what has happened since that last pathetic post featuring me in the slammer? Well, mom bailed me out but none too fast was she. Let me sit an extra day, something about not being able to make it cuz she was gone doing something with that stupid red horse of hers. Grrrrrr.
But I was so, so, so, so, so, so, happy to see her and get out of there back to my own home and my own specials.